Jupiter

He is now about 10.5 months and a real delight! Don’t all parents say that though? I’m not a big fan [...]]]> If I wait until I have something interesting to say I don’t think I’ll ever write another blog post. I should really set aside some time every week to write something.

Jupiter

He is now about 10.5 months and a real delight! Don’t all parents say that though? I’m not a big fan of other kids (lol I actually feel much more comfortable saying this now than I did in the past) but I absolutely adore Jupiter and could talk about him 24/7.

I’m glad I’m not a full-time mum though (it’s a mixed blessing). Being with a baby all the time is really tough and working full-time (from home though, so I see him a lot, which is great) allows me to have a much better mental balance.

We’re currently introducing a bit more of a routine for him. Mostly focussed around his sleeping at night and napping. He’s really at that point where he needs it (and so do we!).

He’s very chatty, although doesn’t say any specific words yet with any consistency (he may have said ‘dad’ a few times and ‘byebye’). He’s crawling like a trooper, SO FAST. He loves chasing the cat. He’s also pulling himself up to standing along the furniture and ‘cruising’. He can stand by himself for a couple of seconds at a time, so I think he’s well on his way to walking soon!

Violin

My violin playing has really gone up a gear. My friends and I had a little performance before Christmas where we played a few pieces we’d been working on and loads of Christmas carols to which the audience sang along. I was very nervous but it was lots of fun!

We’re currently aiming towards another concert during the Easter weekend and we’re playing Pachelbel’s Canon in D. It’s bloody hard! Having two lessons a week currently, plus trying to get in 30 minutes of practice a day. I’m really excited as I love this piece but also totally feel I don’t have enough time to really get it into shape.

It’s so nice to have a goal to work towards though, it really helps with the motivation.

Misc

Taking Jupiter to visit my aunt in Holland in a few weeks. Very excited about this!

Signed up for horse riding lessons again (I had to stop when I got pregnant). I’m on a waiting list though, so I have no clue when I’ll be able to start.

Playing a bit of Star Wars online. The single player aspect of it is very strong and immersive, which is good as I only have about 2-3 hours a week to play so it’s pretty much a single-player experience for me at the moment. I miss grouping up and raiding from back in the day when I played World of Warcraft a lot but I just don’t feel I have the time needed to invest in this, nor the desire to be honest. The biggest thing I miss is the people I used to play with. My WoW subscription expired a month ago or so and I don’t see myself renewing it. *small tear*

I am learning to drive!! Been taking lessons since September. I passed my theory test the other month and have my practical booked in about a month’s time. I’m nervous, but still have quite a few lessons booked to really brush up on everything and practice lots.

It’s actually starting to get good now. From week 5 to week 10 I was quite nauseous and incredibly tired all the time. Now [...]]]> Yes that’s mine!! And Andrew’s. We’re so incredibly super excited and happy! I’m currently 13 weeks and 5 days pregnant and my due date is 21 May 2011.

It’s actually starting to get good now. From week 5 to week 10 I was quite nauseous and incredibly tired all the time. Now I feel fine (although still needing slightly more sleep than usual) apart from feeling RAVENOUSLY hungry pretty much all the time! But it’s definitely preferable to not fancying food at all. Other people probably won’t notice yet but I’m starting to get a bit of a belly, my trousers are getting a bit tight. So are my bras, which I am SO not complaining about =p

It was also really nice and special to get a scan. Before my scan I was just so worried and anxious all the time because there wasn’t really any way of knowing whether everything was alright. I’m not sure what it’s like in other countries but when you get pregnant in the UK you get a LOT of information which include a lot of scary statistics. I’m one of those people who prefers knowledge over ignorance, but it’s very hard to keep positive in the face of so many statistics about stuff that can go wrong (especially in the first trimester).

We went on holiday to Holland for two weeks at the end of October to visit family & friends. Everyone was really happy and supportive. We went by car and actually managed to fit my old changing table (which was also my aunt’s changing table and possibly my mum’s) AND playpen in the boot. It’s like family freecycle haha. I love the idea of using the same furniture that my mum used for me when I was a baby.

On a completely different note, one of my art journal pages is featured in this month’s Art Journalling It’s All Good e-zine. I was really surprised and flattered when they asked. Getting a copy is only $5 and it’s filled with useful and interesting articles about art journalling, I really recommend it. Profits from the sales go to a good cause.

I find it hard to know how this makes me feel. A bit sad, I suppose, but I guess it’s hard to know whether I’m feeling my feelings fully. That sounds like gibberish I know, but I’m sure some people can make sense of [...]]]> Today is my mum’s birthday. She would’ve been 59.

I find it hard to know how this makes me feel. A bit sad, I suppose, but I guess it’s hard to know whether I’m feeling my feelings fully. That sounds like gibberish I know, but I’m sure some people can make sense of it.

What I think is the thing that is hardest to reconcile is that she has been dead for over half the time I had been alive when she died. (I was 15, and it’s been nearly 9 years). In 7 years time I’ll have been alive longer without her than with her. The thought of that makes me cry, because it just seems so impossible. Like, how is it possible that I exist while she doesn’t?

I haven’t really blogged about this before, nor have I really written about it before, not even in private diaries. I’d like to try it more because I think it’s quite worthwhile writing it down, although it’s hard to give voice to what I feel because I don’t think about it much.