You guys, I just had a bit of an epiphany!
I’ve been diving into intuitive painting this past week. As a perfectionist control-freak this is HARD and super scary. But I’m doing it, because I feel ready and I want to push myself out of my comfort zone.
I noticed whenever I did art I’d find it difficult to deal with that feeling of ‘not knowing what to do next’. This would lead to a lot of negative feelings, so I devised a way of working where I would plan my paintings in advance with a sketch and a colour palette. With the initial background stage I’m quite free & loose, but once that is done I will sketch something and from there on I pretty much follow a plan. It works quite well for me, I feel comfortable and the process is enjoyable. This is how I usually work.
BUT BUT BUT as you know, I’ve been falling in love with beautiful abstract-y intuitive paintings. I wanted to try that! Talk about an arena where you NEVER know what comes next, because there is no planned outcome at all.
I’m working on 4 paintings at the same time at the moment, and I noticed I was coming up against a lot of this ‘not knowing what to do next’. And I was feeling crappy about it. And I was feeling negative. And I was feeling that maybe this intuitive painting is not for me, maybe I’m just not one for tapping into my intuition, maybe it just doesn’t really ‘flow’ for me the way it does for others.
That’s when I had my moment of clarity… It’s OK not to know what to do next. I am so afraid of the quiet, so afraid of sitting without doing something… actually so afraid of truly connecting with the current moment, especially if that current moment consists of quiet… But the quiet can be listened to, I can be with it, and it will last a little while or a long time AND THAT IS OK.
It’s kind of like when you’re with someone you don’t know very well, and silence feels SO uncomfortable that you feel you need to fill every little gap, and that’s how I’d been approaching my painting. WHOA, major realisation time! Now all of a sudden it’s like I’ve given myself permission to sit with the quiet. So I sat with the quiet… and I felt a new sense of allowance, of peace and of trust.
I urge you, next time you create and you feel uncomfortable or lost, sit with the quiet. (And then come and tell me about it afterwards!)
14 replies on “Sit With The Quiet”
iris i love how these paintings are coming along!
Thank you Lucy! I go between feeling very self-critical and loving where they are going!
Loved reading this blogpost. Totally recognize the perfection part. Looks like those new paintings are going to be fantastic. Keep sitting in the quiet it does you good. I did something simular when playing with the inks tonight. Just trowing them on a paper.
Thank you for your encouragement Carla! I think trying to get into this ‘free zone’ is hugely beneficial for our creativity and creative progress.
What a fabulous post and wonderful paintings you are doing. I can certainly empathise with you, so much so I just ordered the flora bowley book as I just ‘have’ to try this too and not sure how really. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us x
That’s so exciting Lynda!! I’ve read about half of it and just taking it all in (it’s a lot about how you can approach life intuitively as well as about painting). Can’t wait to see what you create!
I have that book coming on Friday! So excited =)
Love. it. OMG, don’t you love how stuff that turns up in your paintings is also the stuff you might find hard in life? I LOVE that about painting, that the lessons in painting are the lessons in life and vice versa. Incidentally, the two paintings you posted in LB which were more intuitive, so very much spoke to me!!! <3
That’s the thing I loved so much in Flora’s interview, where she says that isn’t painting a wonderful (and safe) place to practice being brave! And then you can be brave in real life, because you’ve had so much practice being brave when painting! I’m really learning that when I feel uncomfortable or annoyed it’s usually because I’m hitting against something that will be transformative if I stick with it and deal with my shit, so to speak =D Thanks for commenting shiny sparkly Tam!!
Great post, Iris. I so understand and recognize where you’re coming from! But it’s such an adventure when you try to just stay with what is true in the moment and follow the process developing by itself. Thanks for giving us a peek into your discoveries!
I admit I’m not too much of a planner when it comes to my art. I have an idea, and then I just do what ever I feel like it. I think in the end I get something that feels unfinished and not cohesive. I think the challenge for me is to actually think it out, let the idea rest and grow, and then put pencil to paper (or whatever). I think that I need to be more purposeful in my art so that I can try new techniques and push myself further, other wise I end up with something that is comfortable.
That’s so interesting Carlie, so your ‘problem’ is almost the exact opposite of mine! I’m starting to try and work more like your initial process, have an idea and then just go from there and see where it goes. I think it’s good to have a combination of free-ness and planned or purposefulness to make the best art possible.
OMGosh, I so struggle with this! I’m working on something that has been covered up at least 4 times with another layer because it didn’t feel right. And then, the next layer just felt like a mask to cover up the last one, but wasn’t truly Me…then, I took the time for a guided meditation and some yoga and finally got my “feeling” for the painting. It’s time to reach deeper and reconnect for me 🙂 Thanks Iris, you’re always an inspiration. <3
I’ve been doing guided meditation myself recently (for the first time in a consistent way – I’m on day 5 and actually look forward to taking 10 minutes for it each day!) and it soooo fits in with this. With allowing space for things to just be. So glad you got your feeling for the painting! That’s the best thing when that happens. Thank you for calling me an inspiration *hugs*